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But she did not feel comfortable about that. Her upbringing had been strict; obedience was expected. It had been a huge leap of faith for her family to allow her to go to New York. "We are counting on you to act responsibly, and to keep the honor of your name" her mother had told her. These words stayed with her and even when some of the other Japanese students began to loosen up she maintained control.When the next lesson approached she found herself looking through her closet for something a. "Mark ... I think I can understand why Sharon would do what you describe. It's a slightly unusual self-destructive behavior, but that's what we often see happen with people that are coping with the loss of a loved one."It's called 'survivor's guilt.' They wonder why they deserve to still be alive when someone they loved so much is dead. When they can't consciously resolve that question for themselves, they subconsciously try to balance the scales by hurting themselves."Something dawned on me.. She has come to learn that when she wants something specific all she needs to do is ask and he will comply with her request. She does get excited when she turns on her computer and him name pops up that he is online also. This in itself is a rarity because they both have busy schedules. Even if he just left a message when she was not online her heart beats faster knowing that he was thinking of her, if only for that one moment. She knows eventually their paths will cross and they can once. Within five minutes she came walking down the stair, David recognized the sound of high heels on wood but was sure Tillie didn’t have high heeled shoes.Tillie walked in the room wearing her hair in a ponytail, her face made up and wearing a red leather corset body with suspenders going to her black fishnet stockings. To finish it all off she wore 5”red high heeled boots with silver buckles on the side, stopping just below the knee. The heels did for her legs what the corset did for her breasts,.
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